Just like many others, I tuned in to the BET Awards this year to see their Michael Jackson tribute and I regret helping make it the most watched show of the night.  Although I wanted to be proved wrong, the horrible outcome was pretty much expected.

BET is a channel where it can't go one hour without exposing children to things that are age inappropriate and making black people look like total asses. But is BET the only one to blame? I honestly don't think they are. I hate to say this, but BET is only a reflection of what's going on in black communities all across America. Although wiping BET from the face of the planet (if it refused to make a positive change) could eliminate some of the madness, it would not eliminate it all.

When we get a quality music artist with great music, we either ignore them, or don't ignite them as much as they deserve. We glorify artists like Beyonce and Lil Wayne more than we do jewels like Alicia Keys.  (Not only does Alicia sing and write quality lyrics, she plays instruments, which is a rarity among females in the black community.  She gives black girls, who want to play instruments, someone to look up to, and if she were hyped up as much as Beyonce, imagine what kind of impact that would have on them.)  If a female singer transforms into this superficial sex-kitten, showing a little bit more skin than most, she gets glorified.  If a male artist raps about cars, money, sex, and drugs, he gets glorified.  (The proof is in their net worth.)  Their music will be played far more because many of us both request and promote them up more.  If we're guilty of any of the two, we a part of this ongoing problem.

We also have to remember that music is an art form…a freedom of expression.  Most music artists are not thinking about instilling positive values in our children.  Although their looking out for our children would be the right thing to do, it's not their job.  (Otherwise, they would be raising our children themselves.)  As much as we would all like to think that entertainers are in the business to simply set a good example, that's not always the case.  They're more focused on survival and making money, which is why some will go through great measures to get it, even if it means demeaning themselves.  Heck, it puts food on the table, and it's legal.

When other music artists see how much buzz and money this can generate, what do you expect? When record labels see that these are the type of music artists who generate more money, what do you expect?  If positivity is rewarded more, there would be more positivity.  However, if negativity is rewarded more, there will be more negativity.   In this day in age, negativity seems to be rewarded far more in the black community.  That's why valuable artists like Alicia Keys are very hard to come by in this day in age.

Growing up, I had both parents in the home. My dad in particular was very strict. I wasn't allowed to watch BET growing up, nor listen to the type of music that it promoted, but I did anyway (behind his back).   (If I didn't get to see it at my house, you better believe that I would see it at the house of a friend.)  I don't know how I managed to do it, but in the third grade, I was rapping to Snoop Dogg and Tupac, although I was too young to know what they were talking about.   One time, my dad caught me watching Blackstreet's Before I Let You Go video, driving him in a huge argument with my mother for not watching me every second of the day.  Music is a powerful drug.  If a child wants it, they will get it.  Whether it be from sneaking a listen from a radio or television, or getting music from their peers.

I always went back to the music I love, but I still balanced out everything I was hearing with the lessons taught by my dad, by school, and by watching people who partook in those negative actions and how they turned out. When Snoop Dogg rapped about smoking "indo" and sipping on gin and juice, I knew that drugs were bad and that drinking alcohol isn't necessarily the best route to go, so I didn't do it.  When TLC talked about how they "creeped" around, I still knew not to be promiscuous and to stay faithful in my relationships.

Unless one locks their child in a cage and monitors them twenty-four hours a day, it's not guaranteed that they won't get exposed to inappropriate dancing, songs, and music videos.  That's why it's up to the parent to step in and teach them what's right from wrong, so when they are exposed to it,  they won't  be tempted to partake in any of the negative actions  glorified.  (Realistically, you can't always shelter your child from everything that's out there.   Even parents who came remotely close to doing it got negative results.  Think to the Catholic school girls or preacher's children who went crack whore crazy once they left the home.)

Lets not put it all on BET shoulders.  Lets not put it all on the music artist's shoulders.  If you're a parent who feels like BET is interferring with the values that you instill in your child, the best that you can do is pray.  Block the station off your television.  Show them examples of negative outcomes of people who lived the lives depicted in songs.  Encourage your child to partake in after school programs so that they can have something a bit more positive to do.