I stumbled across Sabrina’s (Sabbio’s) blog by accident and I’m glad that I did.  This France-born artist creates some of the most beautiful artwork that I’ve ever seen, so I had to contact her for an interview.  When I contacted her, I embarrassed myself because I had addressed her by the wrong name.  Luckily, she didn’t get mad and she happily answered my questions.

Sabbio’s story:
My name is Sabrina, Sabbio being my artist name. I am a 30 year-old painter and art crafter from France, living in the sunny south of this country.

Having natural hair is just great! I’m natural and proud of it! In the past few years, natural women became more and more visible in photos, media, films. Plus, the internet has been a good conveyor of this positive image of natural beauty as well as a great source of information for people with naturally curly, nappy hair.

So I guess there are less negative judgments or maybe it’s just my adult self-confidence which helps too. However, as a child-teenager in the 80s-90s, things were different and yes I had a few negative experiences with silly, narrow-minded, offensive children who chose to hurt me through speaking of my hair (at that time it was braided a lot though because the fro puffs or fro out was even more source of mockery).

I’ve been in love with drawing and colors since my early childhood, but I kept following other paths in life though regularly returning, mainly as a self-taught art lover, to my early passion until I realized what had been mostly unconscious so far. That drawing, painting and more largely creating were a full part of myself and that it was for me a real way to express and to feel peaceful and “complete.”

I would say it’s been a few years since I became aware of this and began to create daily, as if a crucial need.

I think that part of it is an unconscious subtle process but my main inspiration is really women, their inner strength, fights, their femininity and diverse beauty.

My love and admiration for nature is also richly inspirational and is, to me, greatly intertwined with femininity. I also think that other cultures as well as my readings, my ideals and inner world guide me into my art work every day.

I don’t usually paint on 3D pieces, but I would say one of the largest was about 5″x4″x4″ I do create boxes, suitcases, journals and jewelry which is a complementary way to create and offer my art to my art followers.

Still I love to experiment new painting surfaces. I paint on canvas, paper, wood, metal and I think I’ll keep trying my brushes on new ones! (laughter). I would love to continue to explore more thoroughly my beloved working themes and have whole series of the same aspect of femininity, maternity and nature. I would also love to have more shows in France and abroad in order to share more with my art viewers!

If you would like to own a piece of her work, they can be purchased here on Etsy.  Be sure to follow her on Twitter as well!

Now I know many women who have been getting relaxers since they were 6-years-old and aside from a few scalp burns, and barely noticeable thinning edges, they have not suffered any major problems, but there are just as many who have experienced horrible side effects from relaxers.

As a result of relaxers, some women have had to be rushed to hospital emergency rooms and there are those who are now living permanently bald. Likewise, we have yet to learn what the long term effects of putting these chemicals directly on our scalp have on our health.

Thinning hair and a few scalp burns here or there can be tolerated by most women, but imagine these things happening to kids. And again, I’m not talking about children who have sicknesses and losing hair as a result, I’m referring to those who had full-heads of healthy hair that has been damaged do to so-called ‘kiddie relaxers’, by the hands of their parents or guardians at that.

Click here to view the embedded video.

Women can throw on a stylish hat or scarf, or wear wigs or weaves, but a 7 or 8-year-old will not be able to pull off the look without being ridiculed by their peers, not to mention how this will effect their self-esteem.

I remember when I was growing up and if my hair wasn’t ‘right’ I did not want to step one foot outside my door, let alone enter a school building full of other kids. It would have been a living nightmare if I had to get up and go to school everyday as a second or third grader wearing a wig or weave.

First of all, I doubt my mother would have paid for me to have a wig or weave, so I would have been just looking pitiful with broke-off edges, bald spots and all.

Now there has been lots of debate on whether the ingredients within ‘kiddie’ relaxers are less harsh than those found in adult relaxers. Those relaxers that advertise ‘no-lye’ on their label – typed in big and bold letters – actually do so to make the consumer feel more comfortable with buying the product, but the ingredients used to ‘replace’ the lye are just as harsh.

Water, Petrolatum, Mineral Oil (Paraffinum Liquidum), Cetearyl Alcohol, Calcium Hydroxide, Propylene Glycol, Polysorbate 60, PEG-75 Lanolin, Sodium Stearoamphoacetate, Aloe Barbadensis, Oleth-3 Phosphate, Algae, Hydrolyzed Vegetable Protein PG-Propyl Silanetriol, Parfum/Fragrance.

Calcium Hydroxide is actually not lye (sodium hydroxide), but lye can be made from it. A quick definition of calcium hydroxide is lime mixed with water, and it is used in everything from sewage treatment, purifying food additives – citric acid and glucose, glass production and plaster.

Hydrated lime, chemically known as calcium hydroxide, calcium hydrate or caustic lime, is produced by reacting water with high calcium quicklime in an atmospheric hydrator. It is soluble in water and the solution is a medium strong base reacting violently with acids and attacking many metals in presence of water .

Hydrated lime makes it suitable for a wide range of applications including: the treatment of potable water, waste water and municipal sludge, as a chemical process additive; the stabilization of toxic waste for site remesiation (clean-up) and various construction uses including soil stabilization and anti-stripping in asphalt mixes.

Inhalation: respiratory tract irritation. Coughing, shortness of breath, chemical bronchitis.
Ingestion: internal bleeding, possible perforation of esophagus, severe pain, vomiting, diarrhea, and collapse.
Eyes: severe irritation, pain, ulceration, blindness.
Skin: burns, blistering.
Chronic exposure: dermatitis or severe irritation to skin

I would suggest to all parents and guardians that you do not put any type of straightening chemicals on children’s hair. Give them the facts, and let them as adults make their own (informed) decision on whether or not they want to subject themselves to such potential harmful toxins.

http://www.encyclopedia.com/doc/1E1-calciumh.html, http://chemicalland21.com/industrialchem/inorganic/CALCIUM%20HYDROXIDE.htm, http://www.texturesoftener.com/faq.html, http://www.cosmeticsdatabase.com/ingredient/700966/CALCIUM_HYDROXIDE, http://chemistry.about.com/library/weekly/blcommon.htm

I’ve been natural all but about…maybe 5 or 6 years of my life. I was raised to perceive my hair as beautiful and empowering, but let’s just say natural hair resources didn’t exist then as they do now; this was in the 80s, mind you! So I had to sort of figure it out as I went along. I did a lot of afro puffs as a child, in my early teens it was mostly blown out and worn in two cornrows. I wore a relaxer – applying it lightly on my own, at home – from about 8th grade until my first year of college. When I arrived on campus at a prestigious HBCU in Atlanta in the fall of 1993, I saw people with afros, twists, braids, cornrows, and locks — and thought, “AHA!” So THAT’S what I’m supposed to do with it! I haven’t had another perm since.

Although to my knowledge these terms had not yet been invented, I ‘transitioned’ that first year of college, doing heated roller sets, cornrows, braid-outs, a couple sets of box braids. I chopped the summer of ’94 and haven’t looked back.

I fell in love with the concept of handmade cosmetics in 1995 when studying abroad in London. A small boutique called LUSH became my best friend – the shop smelled so good, and everything looked like a deli! Years later, I discovered Carol’s Daughter while living in Brooklyn and thought, even better! Handmade and with hair like MINE in mind! It was during a Personal Economic Downturn (lol). When I couldn’t afford either of my two natural product ‘fixes’ that I started experimenting with ingredients in my own kitchen. So many things we have in our kitchens are simply amazing for our skin and hair – for instance, the line Oyin is named after honey.

I was making goodies for myself, just experimenting and having fun. When I happened upon a mix I loved, I’d share it. I started selling my favorites at local gatherings, artist circles, fairs. Since I was a freelance web designer at the time, it was a no-brainer to put up a site showcasing the products. From there, word of mouth slowly spread. We continued doing other things; making films, publishing books, teaching arts workshops, and grant writing. Two years later, we looked up and it was the bulk of what both of us were doing!

I was raised by Pan-Africanist parents who gave us all Yoruba naming ceremonies, beautiful ceremonies where the child is introduced to the community and to life by a shared tasting of foods and spices that represent different elements of life. I remember the priest singing a rousing song about ‘Oyin’ when the time came to talk about honey and its representation of sweetness and joy. It’s been my favorite word ever since.

On having her husband as a business partner and bringing them closer together…
Absolutely. The desire to work together is a big part of why we decided to work together. We love that we have created / been graced with a life where we get to hang out together as much as we do. We also have a really fortuitous working relationship; his strengths compliment my weaknesses and vice-versa.

On her product packaging…
The packaging creativity comes from me, and mostly is inspired by the properties of the ingredients themselves. For instance, we used the coffee filters for the soap bars because we wanted to highlight the fact that they contained coffee butter. The naming creativity comes from Pierre. It would never have occurred to me to call the solid shampoo the ‘grand poo bar,’ but our customers get a big laugh out of it!

Although the Belly Bars were formulated for your pregnant friend, did it turn out to do more than what it was created for?
Yes, people use it for their faces, to heal cracked heels, to speed the recovery of scrapes, burns, and cuts, and for their lips. It’s really a wonderful all purpose healing balm.

If she could recommend only one product…
Wow. I don’t know if I could. I’m not sure I could live without my big four: honey hemp, whipped pudding, shine and define and greg juice, but I suppose the thing I’d recommend starting with is the Honey Hemp condish.

Her beauty tip…
Know you are beautiful on the inside. This glow is your most valuable cosmetic!

Also, get enough sleep. ;o)

Jamyla says that the most challenging thing about running Oyin was asking for help. Once it got off the ground, running it it with only two people became quite overwhelming. In addition to now having more help, Oyin also has bottling parties in their production kitchen in Baltimore, MD, a walking distance from Penn Station. It’s a great way to meet new people and get free Oyin hair products! If you’re in the Baltimore, MD area and would like to attend one of these bottling get together’s, be sure to RSVP on a date of your choosing by going here. According to Jamyla, the honeybees are what’s the most rewarding about Oyin.

Shout out to all the honeybees!

Be sure to check out Oyin’s website, along with adding them on Facebook, and following them on Twitter.

Do I go back to the creamy crack aka chemical relaxer?
or
Do I do another BC aka Big Cut?
or
Do I travel into unchartered territory and lock it down?

Many with locks come to this crossroads and it can be a difficult to decide what to do. With conviction you may have gone natural, determined to never pollute your crown with toxic chemicals again. Or naively, you may have progressed into the unchartered waters of natural hair to find that you love the versatility of your hair unadulterated. But that time has come and gone. Now, the resentment towards your hair has built. You didn’t plan on having almost all your waking, free hours on the weekend spent in marathon detangling sessions before washing, during washing and after washing, then deal with the challenge of styling your hair and setting your hair. By the time you are free from your hair, it’s Monday! Time to do it all over again. And, let’s say you did a vicious twist that sets all weekend with fierce definition and shine and perfect coils at the end. Then it rains. Poof. Just like in your relaxed days, you’re back at square one, running from the rain, humidity and frizz as you’re hair morphs back into a fuzz ball. So what do you do? You feel yourself wanting to fuss at your hair for not cooperating. You’re really not liking this new feeling welling up from the inside and you; and, you want to be in love with your hair all over again. So, you look at the scissors and think:

Should I? Nah.

Then, you think about taking a quick drive to the drug store for your old mainstay Dark N Lovely™, Nah.

Then you remember there is a third option. Locks!

You wonder if locks are for you. You have never considered locks before and you feel like a newbie natural all over again. There’s so much information you don’t know locks, where do you begin? You never intended to lock, in fact, you didn’t’ go natural to lock and locks were not a part of the plan. But, locks sure beat options A and B. It took two years to grow all of this hair and you sure as heck couldn’t go back to the crack now that you KNOW what it is. So, you begin the process, researching on the art of locking.

So, here you are along this natural journey, every weekend, week and day spent lamenting over your hair and out of no where, locks have chosen you. And, if you decide to concede, you soon learn that locking is a process that is about loosing self and self control. It’s a journey about learning what your hair wants to do versus what you want to do with your hair. Not only are the styling habits different for locked hair; but, the mental shift is nerve wracking. You wonder what do you do if you aren’t worrying about your hair? You’ve spent almost every waking hour in the planning process for your hair. Your hair needs you, you rationalize. But, no, it doesn’t, you need it. You’ve become dependent on your hair. And, locking would require you to leave your hair alone and let it frizz and get wild without your intervention. You wonder if you can do it. You wonder if you are strong enough to resist the temptation of resetting your hair when the frizz sets in. From perms to natural hair, your whole day revolves around your hair. The thought of discovering who you are without this concern is daunting; yet, it is challenging and empowering leading to growth along a path to a new, exciting glorious journey to self -realization if you decide to travel on the journey to locks.

If you see yourself in any of these scenerios, it may be time for you to lock your hair down. There are other physical signs that your hair may be ready to lock:

• Your hair stays in tangled in knots when left loose
• Your hair continues to split and tear
• Your hair tangles easily, even with good conditioner on it
• Your hair grows in protective styles, and looses length from damage when worn loose
• Your hair dries out easily when worn loose
• Your hair begins to matt on its own when worn in any style
• Your hair does not like to be manipulated, and will shed and tear easily
• Your hair sheds a lot when worn loose
• Your hair soaks up moisture like a sponge
• Your hair matts when washing

If your love affair is over and you decide that locking is journey that you want to take there are plenty of resources, forums and albums of lockers out there that are willing and ready to help you. Just like going natural is a process, locking is too. The good part of locking after being a loose natural, is you have already explored the beautiful creation of your hair and all of its textures. You have explored its likes and dislikes. You have worn many products and hairstyles and now you are ready to embark upon another journey of self exploration that will take you to another level as you put self aside and regain the art of self exploration, engaging in other journeys that need your hands, mind, body and time.

I wanted to learn from my mistakes, so I signed up for Qwitter. Qwitter is a service that notifies you of those who unfollowed you. It also shows you the last tweet that you’ve made before they unfollowed you.  There were a few that I looked at my list of “Qwittters” and saw a screenname or two that I was taken aback from.

Being unfollowed can say a little, or a lot.

REASONS WHY A PERSON MAY UNFOLLOW YOU ON TWITTER.

#1. Excessive Posting/Spamming
One of the sure ways to get people to unfollow you is by excessive posting or spamming.  Spamming and excessive posting is by far one of the biggest annoyances on the internet.

I understand that you may be broke,you have a “product” to push, and you a need more eyes to see you.  I’m in that same position myself.

However, you catch more flies with honey and the honey isn’t going to be plentiful if you submit the same message every thirty seconds. If you’re trying to promote something, be sure to add a huge time gap between each post. It may also help if you rearrange your phrasing each time, so that you don’t come off as a total bot.

It may also be ten times more annoying if you’re doing it in a filtered hashtag type chat, as it makes it harder for Tweeters to converse with one another.

#2. Distasteful Tweets
I noticed that the majority of the time that I had valuable followers unfollow me, was when I went on my little joking tirades. Although I wasn’t serious, some people can be turned off by that, driving them to unfollow you. So if you value your followers, be sure to not take it too far as I sometimes have (holds head down in shame with a smirk).

#3. Distasteful Actions
Distasteful actions can lose you followers too. This usually happens often with well known celebrities. Take Tila Tequila for example. On numerous occasions, she has lost followers by the minute due to things that went on outside of Twitter.

#4. Disagreements
Disagreements on Twitter? I’m sure many of us Tweeters may have had them. Maybe it exposed ignorance that people didn’t want to be associated with, or maybe we’re just too damn sensitive. Or maybe someone simply disagreed with you somewhere outside of Twitter and decided to unfollow you because of it.

#5. Incompatibility.
Sometimes, we just don’t relate to one another. If you’re not a fan of motorcycles and all a person talks about is motorcycles and you have no idea who they are, what’s the point of following them? If all a person talks about is what they’re eating or watching television and it e-bores you to death, what’s the point of following them? It only causes more unnecessary clutter to show up on your timeline. This may cause a person to unfollow.

#6. You’re on that Twitter “celebrity” ish.
There’s certain groups of people who only communicate with other famous or “elite” people. Now there’s genuine celebrities who may only ignore because they get too many Tweets to keep up with them, but there’s others who see, but ignore because you’re not enough to pop up on their Twitter radar. Not everybody is star or elite struck and they want people on their list in which will communicate with them. If you’re not, this may drive them to unfollow you.

#7. You’re not following them.
Some people are on Twitter with the hopes of becoming a Twitter rockstar. They follow people in hopes to heighten their follower count through your acknowledging and exposing their screen names to others on Twitter. If they notice that you haven’t followed them back within a certain period, they unfollow you. Silly, right?

#8. Your account is inactive.
There’s some people who need all of the Twitter friends active. Why is it taken this seriously? Beats me. However, not little to no posting on your account can drive people to unfollow you.

DISADVANTAGES OF DOING ANY OF THE ABOVE
You can lose valuable followers that you could have built something with.

DISADVANTAGES OF UNFOLLOWING
Although unfollowing a person is a digital thing that doesn’t take much time or thought, it can burn some bridges, as petty as that mat sound. If they were to make a statement about a project that you would have taken interest in, you may never see it. If they’re looking for someone of your talent to help them with a project, you may never see it.

Kiley Russell was apart of that lucky audience.

However, rather than keeping the car, Kiley (then make-up artist and assistant principal) sold it and used the money to bring a lifelong dream into life: Big Girl Cosmetics.  Now five years old, BGC has been featured in magazines like OK Weekly.

About Kiley…
I’m Kiley Russell, a born and bred Chicago girl. Life is fun, crazy, and fulfilling with my husband and our four boys along with running Big Girl Cosmetics.

Why she started BGC…
I was an assistant principal, but the drive to start my own company and leave something for my children was a huge motivating factor to starting the company. As well, I’ve always had sensitive skin and my grandmother was a mixologist of sorts who’d create lotions and cleansers that I could use. I guess that you could say that it’s in my genes to love skincare and cosmetics!

It was fabulous to ride around in the cool Pontiac G6, but I sat back and thought about the fact that I’d already paid off my car then realized that this was the perfect opportunity to make my dream of Big Girl Cosmetics come true. So I sold the car and never looked back.

How she came up with her company’s name…
Being a big girl is a state of mind, think big live big. When I was younger, I was always the smallest one in my class and the shortest. I would always say I’m a big girl and it kind of stuck.

Challenges that she’s faced…
This all started to come about when I had my first child, so to say that it was hectic is an understatement, lol. There’s never enough time in the day, but it’s such a thrill to have created a company. We have issues that every business has, such as difficult deadlines or drama from others not upholding their part of a deal, but with a great support system of tight-knit family and friends, I thrive.

The most rewarding about BGC…
Having young women tell me that I inspire them and make them want to start their own company. I am a strong advocate of thinking and dreaming BIG, so that warms my heart. People should strive to make their wishes come true and live well.

Kiley’s beauty tip…
Soft, supple skin is very important because have you ever seen someone look good ashy and dry? LOL! I highly recommend my body polish to exfoliate the skin (comes in Pink Grapefruit, Coconut Lime, Tangerine Mango, Cucumber Citrus) and then follow with Ginger Almond Body Butter. Gorgeous skin is the cornerstone to any beauty regimen, because it’s the first thing that people notice. Swipe on moisturizing Diva Gloss and honestly, you are going to be good to go with your pretty skin and kissable lips. Of course, playing around with our mineral eye shadows, blush, and foundation will add to the look as well!

On ingredients…
I would say that going as natural as possible with ingredients is the best bet. Spot test as well to make sure that you aren’t allergic to anything that may be used.

BGC is giving a discount to Afro Glitz readers. Just enter the code BGStyle at www.biggirlcosmetics.com and receive $5 off your order. Diva Gloss and Body butter is also on sale. Get it before it’s over.

Be sure to follow BGC on Twitter.

I made the decision to create Order in my life by washing away the need to be in control, which was driven by fear. Letting go of fear brings Order to one’s life. All I had to do was see things for what they were, see myself for what I was, see the Truth. It was that easy, yet, that hard. Truth is an interesting thing, it’s neither good nor bad, right nor wrong, it simply is. We’re just programmed to perceive Truth as one way or another. So, it was up to me to either love it or leave it but there was one thing for certain, I had to accept it. I had to accept myself as the Truth.

One day, Oluwakemi came to the realization that she needed to grow and give.

She decided to grow by following the Nine Tenets: patience, discipline, common sense, confidence, humility, courage, love, balance, and spirit.

Each time one of the nine tenets was accomplished, Oluwakemi would make a poster documenting that progress. She sells them for $9 a piece and plans to use the money to donate to nine organizations that define one of the nine tenets.

AG: Tell us about yourself.
OLUWAKEMI: My name is Muinat Oluwakemi Amin. Most people call me Kemi, some people call me Muinat, one person calls me Oluwawa and I have about one other name based on birth traditions of Yorubaland but I won’t get into that. I am 28. . .yes 28 years old, sometimes I loose track of my age, which can sometimes be a good thing. My parents are Nigerian natives, which makes me a first generation Nigerian American. I am from Oakland, CA and now live in Berkeley, CA. I love to eat, be creative, collect interesting things and pictures, be quiet, be loud, observe, ponder, converse and analyze. I am quite fond of the environment, African (and African Diaspora) culture and people, the environment, dancing. . .the list goes on. And side note: It would be pretty cool to say that I am a horticulturist at the UC Botanical Garden at Berkeley but the reality is that I am the marketing and membership coordinator there, which is still pretty neat.

AG: What were you like before your journey to emancipation started?
OLUWAKEMI: My journey started before I launched my blog back in October – more like five years ago. I was a person who wanted to move forward and be free but let fear and insecurity get in my way. I was my own obstacle. I believe that you are always the same person, unfortunately as we get older many of us are exposed to elements (environments, people, media, experiences) that move us away from who we really are and into a wounded, fearful, complacent, digressive and unfulfilled version of ourselves. That’s who I was. I was always me but at that time I was trying to be invisible, always hiding the complete me because I felt that I wasn’t good enough, pretty enough, enough.

AG: What are your spiritual views?
OLUWAKEMI: My spiritual view is God. In knowing who I am, I know the people around me, I know the world that we live in, I know the universe and I know God. I believe that God is in all of us, we are all manifestations of God, whether you follow Buddhism, Christianity, Islam, evolution, etc . God is in everything. When we can see God in ourselves, the people around us and the environment we live in, then there is only Love. Imagine if we finally opened our eyes to what God truly is – if a pimp saw God in a prostitute and if that pimp’s father saw God in the mother of his child and if that prostitute saw God in herself. The world would be a very different place. There is no running away from God, just as there is no running away from yourself. Embrace that which is within you to move forward.

AG: How did you go about making these posters (the process)?
OLUWAKEMI: I have had this idea for about two years now. But I started to seriously work on the posters once I launched my blog. For the past 5 months I had been doing a lot of collecting, sketching, and thinking. I was learning a great deal about Kemetic (Ancient Egyptian) culture and tradition and a lot of what I learned struck a cord with me and were in harmony with the nine tenets. Finally the last week or so before the series reveal, I brought all of my sketches, thoughts and collections together and created the posters. The process was a growing experience for me because the concept of the posters went through a lot of back and forth, uncertainty and transformation in my mind. Then, just around the bend the concept was materialized. It was great!

AG: How does it feel now that you’ve achieved all nine tenets?
OLUWAKEMI: All nine tenets are always within me, they are within all of us, but in some of us they are dormant and in others they are fully manifested but a balancing act. I wouldn’t say that I have achieved all nine tenets, but I they are all definitely fully activated within me. As long as I am living, I will have work to keep them active and in balance. But I tell you, it is a wonderful feeling to live purposefully and free. I am a work in progress but the progress is amazing!

AG: A while back, you made a post that confronted negative stereotypes in regards to being Nigerian. How do you confront/deal with these stereotypes?
OLUWAKEMI: It’s funny, not too long ago I was considering moving back to Oakland and I met with an apartment manager for a place that I was interested in. When I mentioned that my family is from Nigeria, she looked at me like she had just seen a ghost but was trying to hide it. Although, I contradicted any stereotypes she may have had, she reacted through association. In working on knowing myself, people and God, I am learning not to take things personally. People make their judgments, which I had to call her out on later, but people are going to judge, criticize, ridicule, etc. I understand that it is all based on fear. A very powerful energy and an energy I am familiar with, so all I can do is stand on my own two feet and be grateful that I am freeing myself from the confinements of fear.

AG: What advice would you give to someone who longs to overcome their fears, insecurities, and difficult transitions as you have, but finds it hard to let go and see through the hard times?
OLUWAKEMI: Remember, reconcile, learn, let go and move forward. It’s that easy, yet, that difficult. It’s all in the process, process, process. I always say that you must reconcile the past with the present in order to move forward into the future. I believe every issue that we have is linked to our childhood, those vital years in our life where foundations are created and set but then we take full responsibility for who we are as adults. See what was done and how it affected you, own your role in your life and do the work. Face that past and reconcile with it. Take what works, leave or transform what doesn’t then let go and move on. You have to crawl before you can walk and you have to walk before you can run.Take small steps. Record what it is you need and want, what you need to do to achieve this – from the smallest step to the largest move. Focus on the small steps and become inspired by the large moves. Hard times will come, but always remember, in the words of Octavia Butler, God is change. Change is eminent but it’s up to you whether it’s for the better or for the worse.

Be sure to check out Oluwakemi’s inspirational blog and follow her on Twitter.

Contrary to my expectations, I rarely received awkward comments regarding my naps, and when I did, it was not from the people I expected. In fact, as time went on and my afro got larger and larger, I saw the relaxed girls trying to mimic my nappy hair styles. It felt like my own little secret. As a teenager, the entire experience was enlightening for me. It filled me with a new confidence that I was unaware of prior. If I could do something that others dared not to try, then the possibilities were boundless. Most importantly, it solidified the idea of not worrying about what others think.

It is a joyful occurrence to witness so many other young women choosing to revolt against the norms and go natural. Regardless of whether the choice is made for better hair health, improved self esteem, or the liberty of chemical free hair. However, many of these young women will have people in their lives who try to hinder their natural experience. For me, this was my mother. After my big chop (a term that refers to the removal or relaxed hair), she was very vocal, at times, about her dislike of my nappy texture. As a strong-willed individual I did not find it difficult to stand my ground, and eventually she gave in. She never able to truly like it; however, she accepted that the decision was mine alone.

Other teen girls may not be as headstrong in their pursuit of nappy tresses, which makes it easy to fall prey to the naysayers around them. Considering the relationship they have with their parents they may even be forced to return to relaxed hair. Often times though, even if friends and family are big opponents to a teen girl wearing her natural texture a compromise can be made.

Here is a brief list of some tips and tricks:

• If you are a teen under 18, make sure you explain to your parents exactly what it is that you want to do. Explain why you want to be natural and the benefits.
• Research! There are plenty of website dedicated to natural hair as of late. Many people jump in without any knowledge of what they are dealing with.

• If you choose to chop off your relaxed ends via a hairstylist make sure they know what you want. Often times you make be talked into getting a texturizer, a curl, or another chemical process under the belief that it is the same a going natural. A barber shop is sometimes a better choice than a hair salon.

• After the cut take some time to get to know you new hair, do not have an expectation for it that is unattainable. For example if your relaxed hair never seemed to grow due to breakage, your natural hair is not sudden going to sprout out 12 inches in record time.

• Keep it simple if you chopped down to a small afro, you will not need to drown yourself in products.

• Finally, do not allow peers or family to put you down and enjoy your natural texture, possibly for the first time since childhood.

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“Happy Mother’s Day, mama. ‘Flllllllllllllllllllllllly!’ (Inside joke.)”

❤ Miss Gee -via Afro Glitz

“Thanks for all of your ‘hair inspiration’ over the years. Happy Mother’s Day.”

❤ Laquita -via Bobeam

“For the girl you were, the mother you’ve become and the woman you are. You are truly my GREATEST INSPIRATION. I LOVE YOU FOREVER AND A DAY!”

❤ Maia

“I miss you every day.”

❤ Carleen -via Carleen Brice

“Happy Mother’s Day! To an exceptional Mom.”

❤ RoGina -via gennatay.tumblr.com

“Mom, I love you more than I can say. You have always been there for me and I appreciate you and everything you’ve done for me. I love you.”

❤ Michelle

“Although I do not have a memory of my mother having an Afro, each picture of her with an afro has served as inspiration for me to love my hair and use it as a form of expression of my personality. Thanks, Mom!”

❤ Mavis

“For mother: …to the Original Afrolicious Queen! Love your one and only”

❤ Keisha

“You were my first hair inspiration, Mom!

❤ Chanel -via Boutique de Bandeaux

“Mom, we LOVE and MISS you 365/7, but don’t worry about us, we did pretty good for ourselves, better than most expected. I’m good, happy, and content! =D, your baby girl is doing great, she married a good man, has a nice spread of land and she does a radio show on the side! All of your grandkids are doing great as well. I just wanted you to know that. Again….LOVE you and MISS you.”

❤ Mina

FACIAL CLEANSER: Dip a cotton ball into apple cider vinegar. Take the cotton ball and gently massage it onto your face. Be sure to be careful around the eyes and nostrils. (If it gets into the eyes, it can sting. The smell is also really strong when it’s applied too close to your nostrils.) Rinse off your face with cold water. Apple cider vinegar will restore your skins natural pH, unclog pores, kill your pimples, lighten up blemishes.

For me, it’s always guaranteed that if I have a pimple on my face, doing this method twice a day dries up every pimple in sight within 24 hours, making it easy to gently scrape off without having to see any blood or pus, or leaving a scar. (However, if I forget to do it twice daily, it’s not as effective and I can almost count on a pimple or two showing up.) If you have pimples that you want to get rid of a little bit sooner and you don’t have the patience to wait twenty-four hours, dip a q-tip in apple cider vinegar and gently massage it onto the pimple until it pops. (Apple cider vinegar has the power to bring that yucky puss to a head until it explodes. Haha.) Once it pops, proceed to clean it out with the same q-tip (the apple cider vinegar is also great for cuts and open wounds).

MOISTURIZER: To keep your face moisturized after the cleanse, dip a cotton ball into coconut oil and rub onto your face. If for some reason you missed a couple dirty spots in your cleansing session, the coconut oil will pick up any access dirt laying around. It will also make your face look radiant, smooth out your skin, and halt the aging process by preventing blemishes, wrinkles, and sagging.

I also noticed that having the coconut oil on my face served as a good natural primer for the rare times that I put on makeup. Also, the irony in this is that I would also use coconut oil on a cotton ball to wipe the make-up off when the day was over. I would then proceed to cleanse my face with the apple cider vinegar method again.

EYEBROWS & LASHES: Add a thin layer of olive oil onto a q-tip and rub across your eyebrows and eyelashes. The olive oil will thicken them.

EYES: For the eyes, slice up cucumbers that are fresh from the refrigerator and apply them to the eyes for ten to fifteen minutes.

LIPS: When you’re finished with your used teabag after drinking a cup of tea, don’t throw it away. Lay it across your lips for about five minutes, then rinse it off with water. This will rid your lips of dead skin and soften them.

Of course there’s many other natural ways to achieve the above. If you have any other natural remedy tips, feel free to add yours to the list.