In a day and age when gossip is the main outlet in which people get news, tabloids have more sales than the latest Stephen King novel, and people know more about John Kerry’s affair than his election campaign, one thing is for sure; people have turned nosiness into an art. What happened to respecting others privacy? What ever happened to minding one’s own business? This is one thing that I was taught in my house. Some people need a lesson (or maybe a refresher course) in common manners. The art of minding your own business isn’t a way to avoid all situations. If that were the case, I would be writing a book. Minding your own business is a way to keep unnecessary issues to a minimum. After all, drama is like those animal fights on National Geographic, its something better to watch, than to take part. These are the ten rules that I live by to make sure I’m always on the outside looking in.
1. Know when it is your business.
This is one thing people fail to get a grip on. Just because it is your cousin doesn’t make it your business. If your name is not said, then it is not your business.
2. Don’t try and fix interpersonal problems.
When you try and play peacemaker, things could get sticky, with you sitting in the middle. Plus, nine times out of ten…. it’s not your business.
3. When people tell you their problems…acknowledge…don’t repeat.
People confide in you about their issues with other people. Keep it to yourself. As obvious at that seems, saying something that seems harmless can snowball quickly.
4. Know when and how to disassociate yourself with people who are with constantly into someone’s drama.
Sometimes you have to know when people have run their course in your life. If you find that you are taking off your earrings or defending yourself too often, maybe it’s time to start handing out pink slips to the people who cause drama. It may be hard, but necessary.
5. Don’t allow yourself to be everyone’s ear.
Everyone has a little has a little psychiatrist in them. Giving advice is something that is done almost daily. If you have everyone sitting on your leather couch, it can become messy (especially if they are on opposing sides).
6. When people gossip to you…acknowledge but don’t repeat.
It’s hard not to allow people to spread business, especially if the person is a friend. When acting like you really don’t care fails, acknowledge and do not repeat what was said…that would be considered gossiping.
7. Remind the gossiping Gabbies that you mind your own business.
People like to gossip. No news there. When those people who get pleasure from gossip approach, the best option is to nicely shoo them away. After all, it can’t be spread if it isn’t heard.
8.Keep your opinion to yourself, unless asked…even then…in moderation.
Drama usually starts with an opinion. No one wants it if no one has asked for it. If someone does ask for it, and this isn’t your business, then give a quick, indecisive answer and go on about the day.
9. If you must tell SOMEONE, make it someone who is completely out of the situation and can (in no way) be put into the situation.
There are some secrets that are too juicy to keep to yourself. Sometimes you need to vent about the things that frustrate you about a friend. The worst person to tell is a mutual friend. The person to tell is your friend who works on the other side of the country, and won’t be back in town for another three years. A person who can’t relay rant of frustration and have it be perceived as talking behind someone’s back.
10. If you do get involved, make sure you aren’t going in alone.
If you do decide to get into a situation, make sure the people who were down for the cause are at your side when you go into battle. Many people have fallen victim of getting rallied into something, then getting left in the cold by those who were gung-ho in the beginning.
When dealing with people, you are guaranteed drama. Learning how to deal with dramatic situations before they multiply in to more drama is the catch. That can be achieved by avoiding the situations, also known as, minding your own business.
